Full Jar.

Early last year, I decided to do something to help me out of a slump, and it helped as the rest of the year, got worse.  I started a "grateful jar", where I would jot down things that made me happy, or brighten me up some. Through out the year I did this, and then on the last day of 2013, I dumped them out and read them. There was a lot of good in my jar, I forgot about some of the things I wrote in there! It's similar to keeping a grateful journal, but I liked being able to "lock" it in the jar and not see it til I dumped it out at the end of the year.

 For my own benefit, because I cannot keep these small slips of paper, I am posting them here. Things that made me happy this year, especially in times of dark, nothing too deep, just random things I would jot down.  I didn't date most of  them, so some may be out of order, I am posting as I read them!

• January; training for a marathon (cleveland, may) if I feel I can do it, 18 weeks away.
• Joined conversations on facebook by joining pacebook run club (outside my box)
• Feeling the runners high!
• Shopping with my mom!
• Day trips to Ikea!
• Out to lunch with Mom (and Kim and Addy who arrived at the same place, unexpectedly!)
• Joined twitter to try and connect with other rundisney fanatics like me (another outside the box)
• Planning Disney trips and Kyle's spreadsheet!  (with Kyle of course, BFF!!)
• Completing a photobook (digital) that has been in delay (always the procrastinator, that's me!)
• Tried sauer kraut (sp??) and cabbage...and liked it!
• Joining another running group on FB to connect with others
• Went the whole month of January wearing "real" clothes to work, no sweats! (nanny) Made me feel less lazy, especially in the cold!
• Kept up with training (marathon) all January, even when I didn't feel up to it, pushed on.
• Grove City shopping with Kyle
• Ran 14 miles on the treadmill, with a potty break at mile 9!
• January mileage total, 94 miles! 1 mile longer than January 2012!
• Annie dog snuggles
• Shopping with my mom and aunt
• Running a PDR (personal distance record) of 15 miles....but at the same time deciding to stick to half marathons for now
• Vera Bradley Outlet Sale fun with mom
• Being ok and not down on myself for deciding not to continue on with marathon training 
• Proud to have kept up with a marathon training plan for 2 months 
• Watching GH again with my mom
• "Disney PR (personal record) at the Princess Half by 11 minutes!
• Disney Princess vacation with my aunt, one of my favorite trips, being in the moment and savoring it
• Running my first ever relay with my brother, Mike.  I had a 5 mile PR on my leg! 
• Running the relay, placing 2nd overall amongst the coed teams with my brother!
• Running the kids race with Addy during Cleveland Marathon weekend
• Getting through the Cleveland Half Marathon in the heat!  (and being thankful I chose to opt out of the full marathon!)
• Kiddie Park with Addy and Mom
• Afternoon of board games with Kim B.
• Zoo and Subway picnic lunch with Addy
• Cupcakes from my favorite cupcake place with my aunt
• Exploring downtown with my aunt
• Movie with Katherine
• Bike rides, alone and with my mom (these rides really helped me when I was feeling lots of nerves and depression)
• Zoo with Victoria
• Surprise cupcakes and a running shirt from my aunt
• Beach with Mom and Addy
• Getting back into training (somewhat) after a summer of lows and no training.
• Running Wine and Dine with my brother; the 1st time I ever ran alongside someone AND had no music for 13.1 miles.  I loved it, it was a blast!
• Finishing the Wine and Dine hand in hand with my brother, which was his first half
• Having accomplished my first 2 a day races, Jingle Jungle 5k and Wine and Dine Half, having never done 2 runs a day AT ALL!  16.2 miles total in a day!
• Fun Disney trip with my mom, aunt, and brother, and Eric and Kyle too!
• Osborne Lights at Hollywood Studios
• All things Disney World vacation
• Runnning the Christmas Story 10k in bitter cold (I do not run outside in cold!), and missing a PR by less than 20 seconds (not bad for having just gotten back into training not long before the Wine and Dine)
• Country Lights at the Farm Park
• Christmas with family and friends

There were many things to be thankful and grateful for in 2013.  It was fun to look back and see what fun I had, and what helped me get through the down times!  I may do this again in 2014!

2013.

so i have totally slacked on the blogging hobby.  i am such a procrastinator, and it has shown in the world of blogging, especially this past year.  it's new years eve, the last day of 2013, a year in which started out ok for me, but slowly fell apart.  it's been an emotional year, with many lows and bouts of depression.  one thing i set out to do early in the year was to try to do my best to keep myself in a happier place.  i found an idea that had you fill a jar full of things throughout the year that helped keep me in a good place, or just things that i was grateful for.  i first posted about this idea here.  so even though it was a rough year, there were many good moments.  i want to remember those, not the bad moments.  

here is the jar now!

so now the year is up and it's time to read all those slips of paper!  i tried my best to document what i could, but i know a few things may have slipped through and not made it in the jar.  it's a tall jar and the paper is pretty flat, but it got about 3/4 full!  not bad, not bad.  i plan to list what i wrote in another post.

so as we say goodbye to 2013, a year i am ready to say goodbye to, i will read through these slips of paper, and remember the good times.  

i have many goals for 2014, mostly just personal stay organized, save money, be healthy (you know, the usual), but my other main goal is to do a better job at blogging.  i have 3 very delayed posts to write; the wine and dine half marathon, the jingle jungle 5k, and the christmas story 10k.  yes, they were all over a month ago, but i am determined to post them, they were so fun! i am still organizing my pictures from them all, especially the disney races, but i plan to post them all here.  they will just be really delayed posts, but i am determined to get them up!  

so thank you for sticking with me, the few readers i have, and i hope to do more frequent postings in the new year, maybe do a revamp of this blog (we'll see), and hopefully gain a few more readers! i read so many blogs that i truly enjoy and they inspire me to try to do better!  time for a fresh start!

ready or not.

in just one week, i will be departing for my favorite place in the world, my happy place!  disney world!

my brother and i will be participating in the wine and dine half marathon weekend!  we are so excited, it's his first half, and my 11th!  i also will up my own challenge by participating in the jingle jungle 5k.

our mom and aunt will be joining us to cheer us on, as well as my best friend and her husband.  it's her first (and as she says, probably only!) half marathon, while he is an experienced multiple time boston marathon qualifier.  we are all going to have a great weekend together!

the wine and dine half will be new for all of us, being that it starts at 10pm at night, and the first disney race for the 3 of them!  not only that, the challenge for me will be participating in the 5k that same morning.  2 races in one day, challenging for sure.

i am very undertrained for this set of runs, having minimal long runs (last one was a month ago and the farthest i have run since may is 8 miles), and the last 11 days off due to be sick.  my goals for these races are basically to have fun (always!), and to finish standing up!  i plan to take the 5k slow and relaxed, it's my first disney 5k and i want to enjoy it!  as for the half marathon, my brother and i plan to stick together, and him slowing to my pace with most likely lots of walking along the way.

i am so excited for the vacation, feeling like it's well earned after the past year.  i am excited for the racing too, as undertrained as i am,  and to share this special event with my brother and friends.  it will be a fun night for sure!

so excited to be immersed in the happy world of disney and to make new racing memories!  hoping to see some of my new run disney twitter and blogger friends, if you see me, be sure to say hi!!

where i've been.

hello there, remember me?!!  i have been absent from blogging.  i haven't had much to say, but there was another reason i was away, it was just too hard to talk.  this past summer was a horrible one, full of emotions and stress.  looking back now, i realize how bad off i was.  anxiety filled days, not knowing what would happen.  emotions out of whack.  depression.  it was a doozy.

last spring i found out that my time as a nanny was coming to an end.  nearly 11 years with these girls, and the attachment was there.  the last year or so, was a bit rougher, and i contemplated ending the job, but i couldn't do it, due to attachment as well as the future unknown.  our attachment outweighed the rough spots.  they are older now, and in reality, didn't need me as much as they once did.  i always said though, that mom and dad would have to be the ones to say,  "it's over".  a year or so later that time had come.  i didn't do anything wrong, which is good!  it was just time to move on, as they can do more for themselves and their parents made some new choices for themselves which put my position as "not needed".  when i found out, i was surprisingly ok with it.  it was hours later the emotions hit, not losing a job, but the daily interaction with my girls.  as trying as it was at times (a teen and a preteen), i would miss them and the dogs and the cats and the house and all that goes with it!  there were some adventures there!

i started job hunting, knowing what i would realistically end up doing, but wanting a total change, but didn't know what that would or could be.  i did what was natural for me, in the way of jobs, but not necessarily at all what i wanted to do; going back into group childcare.  i have an early childhood degree after all.  i needed a paycheck.  the whole process was hard.  i was scared, intimidated after being away from a group situation for over 10 years.  i could have nannied again, but decided i wanted a break from that.  i went on interviews, some were good and ok, and possibly promising, the others not so much.  i didn't hear from some for quite some time, and it made me worry.  finding a quality place with possibly good coworkers and decent pay was hard.  i wanted to find a good energy, i didn't want to be miserable.  i tried to trust my gut.  the longer i went on searching and jobless, dealing with the emotional loss and readjustment, the more into a depression i settled.  lost sleep, nightmares, constant anxiety and nerves like i never felt before that literally started to prohibit me from doing things, like eating, and even running, my usual outlet to release stress, i couldn't do it.  i just couldn't even go out and run.  it overtook me.  i was sapped out of energy.  money was scarce as i did what i could with the savings and small unemployment check that i had to cover the bills i had, after my paychecks ran out.  i was also scared as i have 3 trips in store for the next 6 months, all planned before i left my job.  had i known, i may not have made certain travel choices for next year, but who knew.  not sure any of us did, including the employers i had.  i know it was hard for them to decide what to do, and they were so kind to offer help wherever i needed.  i was also worried my future employers wouldn't allow my travel, let alone how to pay the balances off for these commitments;  who goes into a new job with 3 sets of time off requests?!

people were so nice to me through this.  just small things, like my mom and her listening ear.  she dealt with so much with me, probably more than anyone else, my emotions and uncertainty, my moods that would come at the drop of a hat.  just listening, or riding along to an  interview just for moral support.  my aunt brought me cupcakes from a favorite cupcakery and surprised me with a fun running t-shirt that she knew i would love, but couldn't afford.  a friend bought me lunch.  just small things, simple as a hug, but often would result me with tears. an afternoon of board games at another friends house and an encouraging note in the mail. a call from the teen to go to a movie, and another call from the pre-teen for a zoo day.....those were 2 days i really needed to see them, it's like they knew! even though i couldn't afford to do something extravagent, we each had a good one on one day together.  everyone was so nice.  i am not sure they know how much it meant to me, but it surely did.

as i type this, tears are in my eyes and on my cheeks just remembering how i felt, and at how the kindness of others touched me.  i wish i could do something to repay them.  not sure there is something big enough.

at the end of august things started to turn around.  i found a part time job with toddlers, and ended up enjoying it a lot.  the co-teachers were so nice and welcoming.  it was a nice place to be.  and then i finally heard from one of the places that i was hoping would work out for something full time with benefits.  it was a newly built place, and hiring was based on new enrollment as they find their legs.  it was decently paid and the situation that i thought i would prefer.  i finally started that job around labor day.  while this place is still finding itself , i like the people i work with, and i like the place as a whole.  there are still lots of kinks to work out as it is only a few months old, but it's something and it's good.  i am still adjusting and trying to learn, and there are many growing pains as it builds itself up, but it's going well for me.  (i wasn't so sure that it was right for me after that first day, but i am starting to settle in weeks later, it takes time).

i knew that once i settled into something, i would feel better inside.  and i do.  looking back, i realize now how far in a dark tunnel i was.  not the first time i was in that dark tunnel, but i think this was a whole nother level of dark.  i probably should have gotten medical help, but i couldn't pay for it.  i feel the weight for the most part has been lifted, as i find myself getting back on my feet again.  literally in so many ways.  in running, in working and readjusting to the group care situation, and financially.  i don't love this job, don't hate it, but i am glad to have a paycheck again and some source of  normalcy.  i am happy to say that the last couple of weeks are the first tear free weeks in probably 5 or 6 months!  i am still emotional at times over not seeing my girls and still dealing with that emotional loss, but i am in touch with them, and i see them periodically.  the family is one of the nicest i know, and we will always be in touch and see each other.  it is so nice to not feel emotional and cry at the drop of a hat.

so that is where i have been, too drained to blog.  hopefully i will have more to say, with the wine and dine half coming up (!!), as well as the glass slipper challenge in february at wdw, and my sisters wedding in jamaica in may!  (ps.  my boss was a ok with my pre planned travel, such a load of worry off my back!).  when i was going through this, and still today, i remind myself to be grateful that i am healthy, and have a roof over my head, and surrounded by loved ones.  i don't know how people do it, that go years job searching, it's tough.  add in that emotional detachment, and holy moly, is all i can say.

i have never been so happy to see summer go, and to welcome fall.  and none of it being weather related like most people feel by the end of the summer.  these last 2 years have done a number on me, so i am hoping this fall and 2014 are a bit gentler to me.  i need it.

hope to talk again soon!  :)  thanks for waiting for me.

abc's of me.

ashley tagged me in the latest blogging craze, the abc's of me, which is kinda fun.  so here goes nothing.

A.  Attached or Single?  single, and i like it that way!

B.  Best Friend?   my mom. she puts up with a lot from me, and it's fun to do some of the things we do together.  one of my favorites was 10 years ago, i took her to wdw, i was so proud to have been able to treat her on my own dime to a fun week.  i seriously don't know what i'd do without her.  she is my rock.
(other bff's include my siblings, aunt, childhood friend, and former co-worker!)

C.  Cake or Pie?  cake, hands down.  especially cupcakes.  yummo.

D.  Day of the Week?  friday or saturday.

E.  Essential Item?  water bottle.  i am always thirsty.

F.  Favorite Color?  i have a few.  pink, most definitely, and also gray, green, and brown.

G.  Gummy Bears or Worms?  worms.  i have had a random craving for them lately!

H.  Hometown?  suburbs of cleveland, ohio.

I.  Favorite Indulgence?  cupcakes, diet coke (can't go a day without one), disney parks, and shopping. combine them all and i am in heaven!

J.  January or July?  tough one.  my birthday is in january (and i share it with one of my bff's!), but i prefer warmer weather.  so i guess i'd go with july.  other than my birthday, january is cold and depressing and i can't handle it.

K.  Kids?  nope.  kids have been my job almost my whole life, so that is plenty for me.  and i have a niece to keep me busy!

L.  Life isn't complete without?  laughter.  something i am needing right now.

M.  Marriage Date?  not applicable for me!

N.  Number of brothers/sisters?  2.  a sister and brother, both younger, and thankful for both their friendships in my life, they'd be under best friends too, each in their own way.

O.  Oranges or Apples?  apples, most definitely!

P.  Phobias?  snakes.  cannot even look at them.  just the thought of them makes me squirm.  and death is a fear.

Q.  Favorite Quote?   i don't think i really  have one, but i like "if you can dream it, you can do it." by walt disney.  i should listen to that quote more, especially in regard to my running.

R.  Reason to Smile?  waking up each day in good health.

S.  Season of Choice?  fall.  i love the colors, the perfect weather of not too hot/cold, and the smell!

T.  Tag 5 People.   some of my favorites are:  Lori and Stacey at Once Upon a Run,  Jen at Runners Trials,  the girls at Scoot A Doot,  and Heather at Over-Reacting to (almost) Everything!

U.  Unknown Fact About Me?   i don't mind doing laundry!

V.  Favorite Vegetable?  don't know if i have an absolute favorite, but i enjoy okra, brussel sprouts (roasted), broccoli, and asparagus.  and salad.

W.  Worst Habit?  cracking my knuckles and worrying.

X.  X-Ray or Ultrasound?  neither!  that means a doctor visit!

Y.  Your Favorite Food?  oh, this is hard, there are so many!  Pizza, french fries, diet coke, bananas, grapes, salad, cupcakes, doughnuts and frozen yogurt.  and lately, toasted pbj!  yeah, i like my junk food!

Z.  Zodiac Sign?  aquarius.

if you made it this far, thanks for reading!  i know i don't post a lot, but i hope you will continue to check in when i do post!  (i guess i am boring for lack of anything interesting to post!) :)

what is a fun fact about YOU?!

cle '13.

for the 3rd year in a row, i ran the cleveland half marathon.  this year, i was joined in the event with my brother, who has taken to running this last year, and he ran his first ever 10k!  he needed to participate in a big race and get a time for his entry at disney's wine n dine half marathon later this fall!  

we were up super early, and downtown at 6 a.m. to get situated at the race.

we stopped at the rock n roll hall of fame for a pre race photo, then headed over to browns stadium to hang out til the start!

what i love about the cleveland marathon, is that before (and after) the race, the stadium (where the start is) allows us to use ALL the bathrooms.  it is so nice to use a real one versus a port-a-potty!

this was my first non disney race in which i wore one of my team sparkle skirts!  it was fun to hear some shout outs during my run like "go, sparkly" or "great skirt".  it helped me when the going got rough!

i kept boston in my thoughts as well during the race.  there was a lot more vivid security and bomb squad/k9 units present this year, due to the events of the boston marathon.  i wore boston colors in support.

 my race started at 7 a.m., and mike's 10k started at 7:30.  we hung out til my start, along with our ever present cheerleaders my mom and aunt, and then just before 7 i headed into the mass of people!

i have no photos of me during the race and i didn't carry a camera.  it was a warm day (think princess half a few months ago), but it was cloudy with a small breeze til about mile 7, when the sun broke through.  it got hot!  red flags were out advising us to be careful, and that this was not the time to try to pr!

i was very under trained for this event, having had april nearly off of running due to some sore feet issues.  originally, i had planned to try to pr, but i knew going into this race, between the heat, and the lack of training, that was highly unlikely.  i tried to just have a good run!  i did well, til that sun came out and i tired out.  miles 8 to the finish were hard, and i ended up walking short bits of time from mile 10 1/2 to the finish.  i was not happy about that, but it was all i could do.  i am happy to say that they took out the horrible hill at mile 10 from last year!

i finished the race in 2:16:29, which i was happy with by the end!  it was actually my worst "non disney" race time, but i was ok with it.  i persevered, on tired, untrained legs, and finished upright!

my other favorite thing about this race is the post race treats.  it's the only race i have ever completed that gives you chocolate milk at the end!  it was so yummy and cold and refreshing, as well as that popsicle!  after i fueled from those, i went in search of coke.  i was craving a coke with ice like crazy during those final miles!  

my brother had a great first "major" race, meaning large crowds of people, and his first race where he didn't place!  but super fast guy that he is, he came in 9th in his age group.  he is fast!  i am in awe!  good job, mike!

post race photos!

 all in all, it was a good weekend!

thanks to our mom and aunt for cheering for us during both races!  and thanks mike, for cheering during mine as well!

addy's 2013 race at cleveland marathon.

my niece loves to run, just like me.  (like aunt, like niece, i guess.  and like uncle now too, actually!)  our newest tradition is to run the kids race together, during cleveland marathon weekend.  i like it, it's "our thing" that we do.  this was our second year doing this together, and it is so fun!  this year we added team sparkle skirts to help us go extra fast.  it also helped our cheerleaders see us from afar in the stands!

addy's age group races from one end of browns field to the other.  her pace is fast, she is a sprinter!  i wish i had my garmin to clock how long it took us.  my guess is 1 minute!

 we came.

 we ran.

we sparkled.

 congrats to my little speedster!  can't wait til our next run together!

10 miler relay.

last saturday my brother and i ran our first relay, as a part of the cleveland 10 miler.  it was something new for both of us, his third race and first relay, and my first relay!

it was a great day for running, a little chilly at the start, but once the sun came up, it was hot!  mike started the race at the start line, while i jumped on the shuttle to the exchange point.  it was fun for me to be a spectator for a bit, i got to see the fast leaders come by and cheer everyone on.  i never get to see the fasties go by! 

we both decided that we weren't out to do anything but have a good race for ourselves.  i had taken some time off due to a sore foot, and had just gotten in some short runs that week, and mike was just trying to get himself a good time. mike is a speedster, and was the first or second person to hit the exchange point.  we high fived and i took off!  as i joined the other runners, i realized that i was with the higher paced runners, and i took off, looked at my watch and saw i was wayyyy too fast.  the watch had me in the 7 minute range!  i tried to slow down but it was hard, being with all these faster runners, i didn't want to get run over!  i was passed a lot, but i didn't let it bother me, and i kept at a pace i could handle, albeit it was a little fast, but i decided to try and see what i could do at that level. as i ran, i thought of boston and those who couldn't finish the run, or won't be able to run again, and that pushed me to keep my pace up. once i hit the final mile, i knew that i was going to have a pr (personal record), after glancing at my watch.  woohoo!  i hauled a** that whole race and couldn't be prouder of my time, a new 5 mile race pr.  it was such a fun race, and a perfect day for it.

hauling. a**.   i gave it all i had!

after my brother found his way back to us, we both recieved our medals, and remembered we could scan our bibs bar code thing to see what our results were.  we were shocked to find out we placed 2nd in the coed relay teams, out of 13!  my brother has run 3 races in his short running career, and has placed at all 3.  insane.  this was his largest race to date. i tell him winning these prizes in not normal, and will not happen at his next big race cleveland marathon weekend. unless he has kenyan blood we don't know about. 

 we collected our 2nd place medals and couldn't wipe the smiles off our faces!  

our hardware!
(the clear medal says 2nd place coed relay team)

what a great day!  i am so proud of mike for his fast, great run, and proud of myself after my foot issues to push myself harder than i had anticipated!  and special thanks to our mom and aunt for cheering us on!

our final stats:

overall time  1:21:31

division:  2nd out of 13 coed teams

overall placement:  5th out of 36 teams

mike/leg 1:  37:12, average pace 7:26 (1st out of 13 division runners)

me/leg 2:    44:18,  average pace 8:51 (8th out of 13 division runners)

our dramatic reenactment of the exchange point

great run, mike!  so glad to have a running buddy now!!!

boston.

yesterday morning, i sat with my computer watching the final miles of the elite men and women running in the boston marathon cross the finish line.  i could feel the excitement from the crowd.  i imagined how the runners felt, all of them, as they would cross the finish line.  i remembered my own excitement at every race, as you head toward the finish line, and then cross over it.  accomplishing something you set out and worked your rear off for.  so many emotions happen when you cross the finish line.  happy, sad (didn't meet expectations), relief, joy.  i watched the winners recieve their awards, and then i had to turn it off and head to work.  imagine my surprise a couple of hours later, when i looked at my twitter feed and saw the words bomb, boston marathon, and finish line all together.  what?!  it didn't take long to find out what happened.

at that moment my heart broke.  it broke for the spectators, and it broke for the runners.  i felt the sadness.  many of those runners didn't get to cross that line, or get their medal that they worked so hard for.  it was taken away by an act of violence.  boston marathon is the bucket list race, if you can qualify for it.  just qualifying to run in boston is hard work, i can't even imagine being close to a qualification time to run there.  i know someone who did a couple years ago.  i know of "cyber" friends who were there, running or spectating.  thankfully, they are safe.  i felt for the runners, their moment was taken away from them. for those that were stopped and told there is no finishline.  i felt for the spectators, who must have been so confused and in fear.  

the social media outlets immediately came up with ways to support those in boston.  ideas were posted to run 4.09 miles (4:09 was the time on the clock when the first explosion occured), or 2.62 miles in honor of the race distance.  wearing yellow and blue, or a race t-shirt from any race, to show support.  #runforboston #prayforboston were hashtags that we all used to connect and to show support to the people at the marathon.

runners are strong people.  you can't scare us away that easily.  we are a community.  knock us down, and we will fight right back.  we are determined, i mean we run crazy mileage for fun.  we are stubborn and we push through.  while i was unable to run due to some foot issues, i put on my princess half shirt in honor of boston. i was proud of my mom for wearing her one and only shirt from a race that she walked in a few years ago. (Check out Amy's post of many t's being worn today here) (see a video of shirts worn all over the country here, to the most appropriate song from epcot's illuminations, love that song)

while i am not sure i could ever run the boston marathon, it has made me think of adding one of the boston atheletic association's races to my race to do list.  maybe a 5k, 10k or half will be in my future.  and when i run my next race, you can bet my mind will be on those in boston.  i will be running for them. 

versatile blogger award.

did you know i tweet now?!  i do!  i joined as part of the process of the disney blog stalking for the meetup for the princess half.  i didn't get in.  but i did meet some fabulous friends via the twitter, and many of these tweeps have blogs.  most are disney obsessed, rundisney fanatics, fitness and running conscious; just like me!  i have already learned a lot from these people, and they help keep me motivated.  thanks to twitter, i have a lot more blogs to read now!

last night, just before bedtime, i was tagged in a tweet from the fabulous pavement princess (aka ashley), letting me know she added me to her list of versatile bloggers.  i was touched!  thanks, ashley!  i didn't know that this honor existed, but i'll take it!  i don't have many readers, so it warms my heart that someone put my blog out there for sharing.

the rules for the versatile blogger are as follows:

1. add the versatile blogger award photo on a blog post.

2.  thank the person who presented you with the award and link back to him or her in your post.

3.  share seven things about yourself.

4.  pass the award along to 15 favorite bloggers. contact the chosen bloggers to let them know about the award.

with #1 and 2 done above, here is the rest.

 7 things about me.  this is so hard.  i am an uninteresting person, and this is totally going outside my box.
1. born and raised in ohio
2. i dabbled in figure skating in college.  i was no olympian, but i had some tricks up my sleeve.
3. i am a sweet toothed fanatic.  i can't go a day with out some sort of sweet dessert, and fruit doesn't cut it.
4. diet coke is a staple for me (only in a can, sometimes bottle).
5.  i have nannied for the last 11 years, and been with the oldest child for 13.
6. i am excited to go to the annual vera bradley outlet sale this weekend!  it's a yearly tradition i enjoy, being the vera addict i am.  love the deals, it's the only time i buy vera (unless there is a super deal online or at the outlet stores).  i have lists to shop for others who can't go which i enjoy doing as much as for myself.
7.  i enjoy doing laundry, but i hate to iron or vacuum!

here are my 15 nominations for the versatile blogger award. i have included a couple of blogs i have followed for years, and some that are newer to me, but i have to read them all almost daily now! (some of you may have been nominated before, since some of us "run in the same circles" (no pun intended, lol), but i wanted to include you because i enjoy your blog!)

1. through heather's looking glass

2. this runners trials

3. according to kelly

4. margaritas, miles, and the mouse

5. life in pink

6. twins run in our family

7.  we run disney

8.  shiawaselife and outrunning the monorail

9. once upon a run

10.   run walk fastpass

11.  mom's magical miles

12.  scoot a doot

13. over-reacting to (almost) everything

14.  only in new york, kids, only in new york

15.  pumpkin to princess

confessions in running.

i have a small confession.  i have pretty much stated that i would never run a marathon.  never even consider it.  and if i did run said marathon, it would most likely be the disney world marathon.

well, last year, the trickle of a thought of actually trying to do a full marathon came to more of a realization that maybe i could try it, and maybe i sorta wanted to try.  i didn't act on it beyond looking at very few training plans for a first marathon.  i didn't train for one, and the later half of 2012 i kind of slacked in any sort of training, and only tried to keep up with a half training which was a half assed effort due to other things going on in life that just slowed me down.

so about 2 months ago, i decided this was the year to try a marathon. i had been thinking about it since last may, and really thought about it during the fall after the disneyland half.  i had read many blog recaps on marathons, and actually thought, maybe i could do it.  if i had to walk i would. i would run it slow and at my pace, to say i did it.  i found a training plan in december and sat on the thought.  early in january, i started to use that training plan after making some adjustments to it to fit for me.  i was actually in training for a full marathon.  i told no one as to not put pressure on myself of others knowing what i might try to do.  going into it, i told myself if it felt too hard, or not right, that i would drop back down to the half distance and work on that some more, as it has become a favorite distance for me.

it was funny, after i finally decided to try it, i was out to dinner with my mom, best friend and her mom, and the topic of me ever running a full marathon came up.  i was questioned by my best friend if i would ever do one.  i just kinda shrugged it off, saying if i ever did it would be at disney or here at home in a local marathon, but in my head i was giggling, as i had just started the training plan a couple weeks before, but not ready to admit it outloud to anyone yet.

i told myself to try the training plan, and if i felt i could keep it up and follow through, i would do the cleveland marathon this may.  i did really well following my plan, sticking to the mileage for each week.  i changed it around a bit, since i had already established a base for my princess half marathon in february.  i listed the princess half as a training long run.  i was proud of myself for keeping up with the mileage.  after the princess half, is when the mileage really started to get scary.  i felt myself putting pressure on myself to do it.  this was why i did not mention this marathon training plan to anyone, so there was no pressure.  not that they would have put pressure on me, but me knowing they knew, pressured me!  (my mind is a work of art, let me tell you).  i know that everyone would have been supportive, but it felt easier for me to keep it to myself til i was sure i would really be running a full marathon.

a couple weeks ago, my plan called for my longest long run to date, of 15 miles.  i was scared.  i had run 14 miles before the princess, and that didn't scare me at all.  but for some reason, 1 more mile to make it 15 scared me to death!  i got out and got it done, and it hurt.  throughout the whole run, i was not fully there, but tried to really put myself "there".  i took it slow, and walked short spurts to fuel.  i was so happy to be done. my legs and feet were so tired, and from my hips down it all hurt. how could i keep going for 11 more miles if i felt that way, was running through my head.  (i do know, that is why we train, but how i felt definitely intimidated me).   that week was my longest mileage week of my life, having done that long 15 miler, as well as 15 miles total (by 3 separate runs) during the week, which equaled out to 30 miles run that week.  i was pretty proud of myself for following through.

i also was not too proud to admit to myself (and to my mom who i had confessed this plan to while i was in florida) that i was not ready to commit fully to the marathon distance.  i know i may have had a bad long run, and future ones may not have been as bad, but it was enough for me to feel that i was not ready to proceed so quickly to up the mileage. (running can be as much mental as it is physical, and that is definitely true for me, especially as i tried to do this).  i didn't want to overdo it, or risk injury.  (i have had some sore feet issues since that 15 miler).  also, the time to commit to training (as well as the winter weather that won't go away) contributed to my choice.  i am not an early riser (unless it is sooo hot outside and i have to get the run in in hot summer time), and i enjoy my weekends.  i was not fully committed to giving up so many saturday or sunday 2+ hours each weekend and post long run many times, i don't want to do anything but lay on the couch.  at this time of year, probably the one benefit to winter running, is you don't have to be up before dawn beat the heat.  you can get up at a normal hour and go out.  so some days, my day is gone by the end of the long run.  i know it does not have to be like that, but for me, i am being selfish with time.

i am proud i committed to trying it, and seeing if i could do it.  i know plenty of people who do train for their first marathon in the way i was going to.  i decided it was not for me.  i decided i would like to work on my longer distance runs on my own pace, without having a "deadline" ahead of me.  (race day).  i think that made me feel more pressured.  each week worrying about the longer distance and knowing i had to do 26.2 miles on a certain date, in a certain amount of weeks from now.  i decided that for me, i think working on longer distances will be a longer process for me.  maybe i can work on long runs like 15 miles a bit more and acclimate to such distances a little more to make it seem less daunting.  i just want to take my time to build my mileage.  and also, this cold, winter weather also pressured me, because i do not like going out in it to run, and to run for 2+ hours made the thought worse.  i do not like below freezing temps and snow/ice.  that definitely was hindering my thoughts to train.

i have not ruled out a full marathon.  but i will work toward the goal of training for one, if i feel like i still want to train for one, and so that i can feel more confident and physically a bit more ready to hit those mileage goals.  one thing i should remember that i have learned recently is, that rather than look at it as "so many more miles" than such and such distance, but look at it as more of  a time stretch; "17 miles is only 15 minutes longer than a 15 miler" type thought.  that is something that may work better for me, since i kinda freaked at the thought of 15 miles over 13 or 14.

for now, i am sticking to half marathon distance, and training to better my speed and time for that sort of race.  and if i feel like it, i will add in some longer runs,such as the 15 miler, so that maybe, when the time feels right, i will feel more confident and less pressured from myself, on achieving full marathon status.

i have to admit, when i came to the decision to put the marathon thought on hold, i felt relief lift from within.  i just felt too pressured (all me), and for me, this is something i will have to work toward.  i do know some people can just go out and get it done for the first time with an 18 week plan, or whatever, but for me, it will be a gradual process, and hopefully getting in some longer runs of 15 miles at least, will ease my worry!

i will say that i am proud that i kept up with the training for 8 weeks, almost half of the plan!  just knowing that i could keep up with that is a boost, because the training plan for marathons intimidates me more than the actual race itself!  (race is 26.2 miles on one day, whereas training is months worth!)

so i am not there yet, but way closer to 26.2 than i ever thought i would be.  2 years ago, i said "never".  and now i say "maybe."  we will see what the future holds.  never say never is what i have learned.   (and now the justin bieber "never say never" song is stuck in my head.  bad choice of words, but it is true for me!)

thanks for getting through my rambling.  they tend to be long.

Princess Half 5th Anniversary Recap.

The Disney Princess Half Marathon was celebrating it's 5th anniversary and I was not going to miss out! There was a special redesigned medal this year in celebration, and once I saw it, I was in.  It doesn't take much to get me to run at Disney World.  This was my 5th Disney half marathon, and it was just as wonderful and fun as my first! (although this race was so warm, while my first, the Disney Half, in January 2010, was in record cold temps and sleet/snow!).

My day started out early, very early.  I woke up at 2:15 a.m. to allow plenty of time to get myself ready and on a bus to the race start. Thanks to walking around the parks, my feet and legs already felt like they had run 13.1 miles already, so I took extra care of my feet prior to the race.  

I was excited to be in Corral A for the 2nd year in a row!  

 I was excited to wear my new team sparkle skirt for this race! My chEARleader aunt, was snapping photos of me getting ready (unbeknownst to me), adding that final touch before we headed to the bus stop to hitch our ride to the race.  

 I love Disney races.  They are so well organized, and the process is seamless.  Once at Epcot, we headed to the family reunion area of the race.  We found some porta potties just before the entryway into the family reunion area and with no lines so I made use of those!  (lots of hydrating leading up, it was high humidity and 70* at the start).  

 I had planned to try to  make the PBRC photo meetup, a running group page on facebook that I follow, but due to crowds and being stuck in a bottlenecked entrance, it was past meetup time, and I decided to head straight to my corral.  I was a little worried about getting to my corral on time, because last year the process was so overcrowded and slow, I made it to the corral literally just before the official start.  This year I did better about that!

My aunt wished me luck and headed off to the monorail to stake out a mile 4 spot, and I headed to the corrals.  

Since this was my 3rd Princess Half, I had decided to try to run the whole thing, without doing photo stops.  This is very unlike me at a Disney race, but I decided to try to challenge myself and see if I could better my "disney" race time.  I carried my camera just in case, but I only ended up using it before the race.  And here they are.  These are the only race photos I took. (the rest were from my aunt and the pros).

You're welcome.

Finally the Fairy Godmother sent us off with beautiful fireworks and words of inspiration!  It was time!  I was excited!  It was dark and muggy, but I tried to keep my pace where I wanted it to be, without over doing it.  I got into my groove and zoned out to my ipod.  Around Mile 4, I found Aunt Linda, I was already a sweaty mess.  She snapped this not so pretty photo of me.  I basically stopped for 1 second and told her I can't stop!  I am going!  I was in a groove and didn't want it to stop!  This is really a scary photo.  I apologize. 

 Miles 1 through 5 seemed to go by pretty quickly, for which I am glad, because before I knew it we were heading into the Magic Kingdom.  I love this part of the race!  Every day of training, you envision running up Main Street, with Cinderella's Castle beyond.  It is such a beautiful view!  The crowd support is always awesome throughout the whole race, but especially turning onto Main Street, it always sends chills up my arms!  I had a big smile on my face!  No matter how many times I have run this route, it never gets old!

 After Main Street, we turned into Tomorrowland, on through Fantasyland, and then the other big moment, the run through the castle!  Another moment of chills down the arms!  I tried to do a jump pose for the photographer, but it was a fail!  Instead, I look like I am flying.  Oops.  

Ok, I lied.  I stopped once.  I decided to try to do a jump shot in front of the castle.  There wasn't a line, so I figured I would give it a shot!  Well, it kinda worked.  Except they got me as I was on my way down.  And you can't even see the castle so I look like I am half jumping in the dark for kicks.  Goals for next year.  Get a jump shot.

After the excitement of the castle, we wound our way through Liberty Square and Frontierland, then backstage to get back out onto the road.  This was the more boring part.  Road.  Grass.  More road.  I tried to zone out and keep my pace, although it was a little slower than I wanted, but it was hot and I didn't want to overdo it, and I knew if I kept it up, I could have a new disney pr.  I wanted to save energy for the Mile 10 cloverleaf.  Oh yes.  Uphill, in a circle, with slanted road.  Take that feet and legs.  Then came Mile 11 and 12 with 2 rather stretchy inclines.  Take that some more legs.  But those legs ran up all 3.  Stubborn determination right there, people.  I was done though after Mile 12.  I saw Aunt Linda, and waved but couldn't stop.  If I did, I might fall over.  Finally we entered Epcot and I tried to amp it up to finish strong.  My legs were done!  I was still smiling though!!

 Almost there!  I wanted that awesome medal!!!!

Bam!!  A new "Disney" race PR!!  By 11 minutes! (actually, it is one of my better race times overall).

Making my experience complete was high fiving Mickey Mouse himself, just as I crossed the finish line!

It never ceases to amaze me, as I cross a finish line, that I did it!  I always get emotional at the end. No matter how many races that I have done, that this non-athletic girl, the one who was last chosen for teams in gym class, the one who couldn't run a block, crossed yet another 13.1 miles off the to do list.  I am a runner!  Hard work pays off.  And it did for 25,000+ people that day.  I was proud of all of us.

 Proud was all I could feel, not only for myself for following through with my goals, but for every person who crossed that start line and giving their all.  

My aunt took this photo of the finish just before I crossed it.  What's up with the 2 different times?!!!

So excited over my new pr!  2:14:25

 This was my 9th half marathon, and my 5th Disney half marathon.  I couldn't be more happier or excited than I was for the first!  Disney never disappoints, and I had a blast.  Every mile really is magic at Disney.  Running these races makes all the cold, snowy training runs worth it.  Nobody does it better than Disney does, I mean, where else can you run in such fun costumes and sparkly skirts and tutu's?  And wearing tiara's on your head.  Even men join in on the fun.  Disney knows how to do races right, and I totally love it.  The whole experience is awesome.  

 After the race I found a couple of friends to share in my glory.  Ariel was such a chatterbox, I couldn't get a word in edgewise.  She really liked all my sparkle.  Thanks to Run Team Sparkle for that!  She also liked my headband and wanted to get some for her sisters.

Jasmine was envious of my new bling.

I rehydrated with water and a diet coke.  It's all I wanted when I was done running!

I met my goals, and am completely happy with my finish time. 

I absolutely love my new medal.  I love my sparkly skirt, too!  I want to wear it all the time! Both of them!

After the race, I got all cleaned up, and we played at the Magic Kingdom, before calling it a day.  It had been a long one, but a very fulfilling one!  

My stats:

Clock time: 2:15:29

Net time:   2:14:25

Overall place:  2169 out of 22,734

Gender place:  1926 out of 21,236

Division place:  325 out of 3,248

5k split:  32:18

10k split:  1:03:57

15k split:  1:36:16

Thank you for a run well done, runDisney!!  What fun, I can't wait to do it all again!

Dreaming magical Disney Dreams!  (I never took that thing off once I had it!)

 Next up for me at Disney will be  the Wine n Dine half marathon!  A night time event!  Excited!

 Thanks for reading this overly long post!   

Do you have a rundisney race planned?

*my previous rundisney races*

2010 disney world half

2011 princess half

2012 princess half

2012 disneyland half marathon and coast to coast challenge